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Yanno that time I went to DC and slapped every liar across the moosh?

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oh, wait… I Misspoke

Yeah… I never did that. That was the weekend I surfed in the Mavericks.

oh, wait… I Misspoke: I was actually dipping live lava from Kilimanjaro. I make jewelry with it donchanooo.

No, erm… I Misspoke. I was actually watching gang members chase Brian Williams thru the New Orleans Ritz-Carleton. [Poor man, he looked to have a terrible case of dysentery.]

[Veterans Affairs Secretary Robert] McDonald spoke to a homeless veteran in Los Angeles who told him he had served in the special forces.

“Special forces? What years? I was in special forces,” McDonald replied.

ooooooo…. Turns out, he …erm, Misspoke. [buy, hey — he did complete Ranger training. Something I did one lazy weekend in Spring, so I’ll cut him some slack on that one…]

Oh, yanno what else he Misspoke about?

Nine hundred people have been fired since I became secretary. We’ve got 60 people that we fired who have manipulated wait times.”

oopsie.

Of the 75 employees, only eight employees have actually been removed, as of Feb. 13, 2015. Twenty-three cases were pending. Five employees resigned before a decision was made on their case. Others were demoted, were on probationary termination, had some other disciplinary action, or had no action taken at all.

Misspoke.


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